A Decisão que Sofia Tomou

Sofia e Margarida estavam sentadas no Café Santa Cruz, em Coimbra. O semestre de Arte tinha começado há três semanas. Sofia olhava pela janela e mexia devagar no galão já frio. Margarida sorriu e perguntou: "Então, pensas às vezes naquilo que deixaste para trás?" Sofia respirou fundo. "Penso. Mas agora penso de outra maneira. Pensava demais, naquela altura."

Sofia and Margarida were sitting at Café Santa Cruz, in Coimbra. The Art semester had started three weeks earlier. Sofia was looking out of the window and slowly stirring her already cold galão. Margarida smiled and asked: "So, do you sometimes think about what you left behind?" Sofia took a deep breath. "I do. But now I think differently. I used to think too much, back then."

"Durante meses, não fazia outra coisa senão pensar", disse Sofia. "De dia pensava nas aulas de Direito, que não me interessavam. De noite pensava nos desenhos que guardava na gaveta. O meu pai pensava que Arte não dava emprego. A minha mãe pensava o mesmo, mas nunca dizia nada. E eu pensava que, se calhar, eles tinham razão. Pensávamos todos coisas diferentes, e ninguém falava das dúvidas à mesa." Margarida ouvia em silêncio.

"For months, I did nothing but think," said Sofia. "By day I was thinking about my Law classes, which didn't interest me. At night I was thinking about the drawings I kept in the drawer. My father thought Art didn't give you a job. My mother thought the same but never said anything. And I was thinking that maybe they were right. We were all thinking different things, and none of us talked about our doubts at the table." Margarida listened in silence.

"Lembras-te do telefonema que te fiz em outubro?", perguntou Sofia. Margarida riu. "Claro que me lembro. Tu pensavas que eu ia tentar dissuadir-te." "Pois pensava. E quando me disseste 'segue o teu coração', pensei logo que era fácil para ti dizeres isso. Mas continuei a pensar nas tuas palavras toda a semana. Tu pensavas que eu já tinha decidido. E se calhar tinhas razão."

"Do you remember the phone call I made to you in October?" asked Sofia. Margarida laughed. "Of course I remember. You thought I was going to try to talk you out of it." "Yes, I thought so. And when you told me 'follow your heart,' I thought straight away that it was easy for you to say that. But I kept thinking about your words all week. You thought I'd already decided. And perhaps you were right."

Sofia pousou a chávena. "Numa tarde de outubro, estava no meu quarto a olhar para o Mondego. De repente, pensei uma coisa que nunca tinha pensado antes: porque raio estou sempre a pensar no que os outros querem? Peguei no caderno e desenhei três horas seguidas. Pensei em mim, pela primeira vez na vida. E pensei que, se não fizesse aquela mudança, ia arrepender-me para sempre."

Sofia set down her cup. "One October afternoon, I was in my room looking at the Mondego. Suddenly, I thought something I had never thought before: why on earth am I always thinking about what others want? I picked up my sketchbook and drew for three hours straight. I thought about myself, for the first time in my life. And I thought that if I didn't make that change, I would regret it forever."

"No fim de semana, fui a Lisboa. Falei ao meu pai durante o jantar. 'Pai, pensei muito e decidi mudar para Arte.' Ele pousou o garfo. A minha mãe olhou para mim e depois para ele. Ele pensou um bom bocado antes de responder. Pensei que ia zangar-se. Mas não. Pensou, pensou, e acabou por dizer: 'Se pensaste bem, fala com o teu orientador.' Foi a primeira vez na vida que ele me tratou como adulta."

"At the weekend, I went to Lisbon. I spoke to my father over dinner. 'Dad, I've thought a lot and I've decided to change to Art.' He put down his fork. My mother looked at me and then at him. He thought for a good while before answering. I thought he was going to get angry. But no. He thought, and thought, and eventually said: 'If you've thought it through, speak to your advisor.' It was the first time in my life he had treated me as an adult."

Margarida ficou a olhar para ela. "E agora? Não te arrependes?" Sofia sorriu. "Às vezes penso que tudo podia ter corrido mal. Mas ainda bem que pensei assim naquela noite. Às vezes pensamos demais; outras vezes, pensamos tarde demais. Naquela noite, pensei à hora certa." Margarida levantou a chávena. "Então, brindamos ao pensamento certo na hora certa." E riram as duas.

Margarida stayed looking at her. "And now? Don't you regret it?" Sofia smiled. "Sometimes I think it could all have gone wrong. But I'm glad I thought the way I did that night. Sometimes we think too much; other times, we think too late. That night, I thought at the right moment." Margarida lifted her cup. "Then let's toast to the right thought at the right time." And the two of them laughed.